Repentance & Redemption

_{By Chelisse Dunn
Contributing Writer}

Let me ask you this: have you ever felt so far from God as if you were a stranger to Him? Have you ever been in a position where you wanted to do right, but evil always presented itself? Have you ever been in a place where you knew your will was weak and no matter how much you desired to strengthen your inward man, you became even weaker?
Well, saints, that was me not long ago. I was once in a place where I needed to know that God still knew my name; that He still considered me as His child; that He still had His hand on my life even though I felt so far from Him. My spirit man died and I was desperate for ANYONE to come to my rescue. I needed direction. I needed guidance. I needed hope. I felt so rejected from the people and things that I knew and loved. I struggled with my sin, as well as the fact that I turned my back on what I knew was right and as a result, paid a great price. Who I was diminished every time I saw the stares or heard the gossip—as if it were not enough that I constantly beat myself up with questions such as “how could this have happened to me?” “what was I thinking?” and “how could I allow myself to be in this situation?” I felt that this should have never happened to ME. Point Blank!

It is so easy to ask God for forgiveness and then turn around to sin all over again. Through my experience, I knew that I never wanted to hurt God again. Repentance is described as a deep sorrow, compunction, or contrition for a past sin, wrongdoing, or the like. I promised the Lord that I meant my walk with Him this time, and THIS TIME I was going to get it right. It was not until I got to that place in my walk where sin had an odor, that I was able to totally turn my back to sin and say “NO” to temptation, wipe my hands of it and completely walk away! And I will be honest enough to say that it is not an easy process - I am human and my flesh gets weak, but I love Jesus more than anything on this earth and I mean to make Him proud.
Redemption is the act of redeeming or the state of being redeemed; deliverance, rescue; atonement for sin; repurchase, as of something sold:
It did not matter how many times I went to the alter crying my eyes out asking God for His forgiveness, redemption did not fully come until I forgave myself. As they say, we are our worst critiques.
Through my experience I want to encourage someone out there who is struggling with life’s ups and downs to get to know who God is. In knowing who He is, you will know that He is an able God—able to deliver you out of any situation. I can truly say that I know Him for myself and the power of His resurrection—what a mighty God we serve. And I look forward to serving Him all of my days!